I can happily say that I landed my very first part time job that has potential to help with my future career. In fact, I am over the moon because there’s a possibility that this retail job will open the doors for me to further follow my ambitions within the fashion sector. I don’t care that I was meant to cut down the hours in my final year at uni. I quit my previous job to find a more ‘easy-going’ replacement. Here I am, a month ago I’ve signed a contract to work in the office during weekdays, an odd 12h per week. And now I’ve signed a contract to work for a luxury brand, another odd 15h per week. Good bye my weekends. Again.

As mentioned, I am still happy how the things turned out. But you know, I am absolutely terrified about the concept of entering a bitchy, ‘Devil Wears Prada’ kinda life. It was enough to go through an assessment centre as part of my application. The Head Office greeted me with the stunning receptionists, those goddess creatures where one cannot find even the tiniest flaw. Or maybe they are just experts at applying their make up and know that wearing all black makes you always look great. Whatever is the case, I got terrified that this is the type of people I will be surrounded with. And the girls that took part in the assessment didn’t make it any better either – one of them gave me such a glance that I started debating my existence.

After it got confirmed that I have landed my part time job (perhaps my never shut up kinda character gave the impression that I know more than I do, but I ain’t complaining), my friends and I joked that it’s time to go on a salad diet. Max 1000 calories. Until one of my friends went further and suggested I should consider liquid diet. If it was the diet of Long Island Iced Teas, I would consider it as a legit offer. Unfortunately, it’s not. But who am I kidding,  what needs to happen for me to stop eating candies, cheese and drink cocktails. I am yet to find the factor behind such act. And even this job is unlikely to change my habits.

I do know that it is all about confidence and that the society should never pressure you to look a certain way. You should only change if it will make you feel better, not because of the society’s expectations. But that is the obvious, and it is not a blog for those who need a confidence push, so let’s not further chat about it. The point is, that’s how the society is built and sadly enough everyone gets greeted by their looks, and the first impressions come from the looks, and let’s not lie since we all know that first impressions count. I guess, I am just freaked out that while I am still work in progress in terms of establishing my confidence and taking it more often for a walk with me is not part of my daily routine, it will be hard to not think about how I am not meeting these expectations that the society has in the industry that I am entering.

As of right now, I will go and eat my mum’s homemade cheese cake and drink some peppermint tea. And tomorrow I will get back to worrying about this new job. Until I repeat my routine of cake and tea in the evening. Oh well.



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